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Notes on a Silencing: A Memoir

Notes on a Silencing: A Memoir

A riveting, lucid memoir of a young woman's struggle to regain her sense of self after trauma, and the efforts by a powerful New England boarding school to silence her--at any cost

When the elite St. Paul's School recently came under state investigation after extensive reports of sexual abuse on campus, Lacy Crawford thought she'd put behind her the assault she'd suffered at St. Paul's decades before, when she was fifteen. Still, when detectives asked for victims to come forward, she sent a note.

Her criminal case file reopened, she saw for the first time evidence that corroborated her memories. Here were depictions of the naïve, hard-working girl she'd been, a chorister and debater, the daughter of a priest; of the two senior athletes who assaulted her and were allowed to graduate with awards; and of the faculty, doctors, and priests who had known about Crawford's assault and gone to great lengths to bury it.

Now a wife, mother, and writer living on the other side of the country, Crawford learned that police had uncovered astonishing proof of an institutional silencing years before, and that unnamed powers were still trying to block her case. The slander, innuendo, and lack of adult concern that Crawford had experienced as a student hadn't been imagined as the effects of trauma, after all: these were the actions of a school that prized its reputation above anything, even a child.

This revelation launched Crawford on an extraordinary inquiry into the ways gender, privilege, and power shaped her experience as a girl at the gates of America's elite. Her investigation looks beyond the sprawling playing fields and soaring chapel towers of crucibles of power like St. Paul's, whose reckoning is still to come. And it runs deep into the channels of shame and guilt, witness and silencing, that dictate who can speak and who is heard in American society.

An insightful, mature, beautifully written memoir, Notes on a Silencing is an arresting coming-of-age story that wrestles with an essential question for our time: what telling of a survivor's story will finally force a remedy?

Titulo:Notes on a Silencing: A Memoir
Idioma de edición:English
ISBN:9780316491556
Tipo de formato:



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Leer de PDF


Acerca de Lacy Crawford

I'm the author of EARLY DECISION and NOTES ON A SILENCING. I live in Southern California with my family.


    Notes on a Silencing: A Memoir Comentarios

  • Jennifer ~ TarHeelReader

    Quick thoughts: Important, timely, exceptional on audio (the author narrates). Lacy Crawford was silenced in every way after a sexual assault while she attended boarding school. She has found her voic...

  • Anna Luce

    “The teachers, rectors, lawyers, and priests of St. Paul’s School lied to preserve their legacy. It would take decades to learn not to hate the girl they disparaged, and to give her the words she ...

  • sarah xoxo

    "First, they refused to believe me. Then they shamed me. Then they silenced me"Notes on a Silencing was a powerful and emotional look at sexual assault, privilege, power and corruption within the very...

  • Christina

    A heartbreaking and important memoir about sexual violence at a boarding school, and the equal violence done to the victim by the school’s cover-up.This story begins with the brutal assault, and the...

  • Jeanette (Again)

    This makes me so furious that I can't think straight. The Episcopalians are just as bad as the Catholics when it comes to their handling of sexual abuse. Protect the institution at any cost. It's all ...

  • Cheryl S

    "First, they refused to believe me. Then they shamed me. Then they silenced me"Never have I read such a powerful description of life after an assault. The lengths taken to keep the statutory sexual as...

  • Chelsey (a_novel_idea11)

    Lacy Crawford's powerful memoir addresses her time at the elite private high school, St. Paul's in rural New Hampshire during the early 1990s. During her fifth form year at the young age of 15, Lacy w...

  • Carolyn Rummel

    I received this in a Goodreads Giveaway and count myself privileged to get to read it before it is published in 2020. This retelling of the author's sexual assault by two students at her boarding scho...

  • Sarah D Bunting

    An infuriating stunner. ...

  • Brittany

    This is a very difficult story to review. Lacy from the very beginning describes the graphic, horrifying sexual assault she experienced at a prestigious boarding school that was covered up by so many ...

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